Mos Eisley Happy Hour - The Phantom Menace
01:33:17
About
A long time ago, on a Podcast in Essex... It’s 1999, Clinton and Blair are still in charge, “Pretty Fly For A White Guy” is annoying everyone and Kevin Spacey is still a viable Oscar nominee. We kick off our Star Wars watch-through with “The Phantom Menace” (and at least from here it can only get better). So dust off your most offensive accents; stick some Midi-chlorians on the barbie; marvel at the knife edge excitement of a trade embargo; and ponder how anybody didn’t realise Palpatine was the Emperor! Watch (or more likely re-watch) to avoid spoilers, and join us. FEATURES STRONG LANGUAGE. APOLOGIES FOR ANY SOUND QUALITY ISSUES -CURRENT QUARANTINE MEASURES MEANT WE HAD TO RECORD THIS EPISODE REMOTELY.
Transcript
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UnknownGood evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to The Mos Eisley Happy Hour.
AdamUh, my name is Adam, and anyone else want to offer their names, or are we all gonna remain incognito?
UnknownIt looks like we have Wesley Sith over there.
UnknownThat's me.
AdamAnd we also have with us Lee. Hello. And hooded and ready as ever, Chris. Hello.
AdamAnd uh, yes, this is going to be, uh, this is the first episode, obviously, of a new podcast where, uh, we've had the bright idea of a bunch of white men in their 30s to 40s talking about Star Wars, because no one's ever done that.
UnknownOh. Shock. Horror. And uh, in fact, in fact, you know, I've done my research, I think we might be the only Star Wars podcast. So, you know, it's great to be trailblazing in these circumstances.
UnknownIt's a bit niche, to be fair. I did think that when you suggested it, but I thought, well, you know.
AdamWell, you know.
ChrisWe're original, if nothing else.
AdamAnd maybe a couple of people out there who might want to listen. Who knows?
AdamUm, but, uh, yes, and today's today we are starting, we're gonna run through the Star Wars movies in in universe chronology. So, we are starting here at Episode 1, The Phantom Menace. And for that, we can only apologize.
AdamI will also I will also add up front, obviously, this is going to be filled with spoilers, because we're gonna assume that you've seen a movie that is going to be 22 years old this year, and also you're listening to a Star Wars podcast, so I kind of assume, we're gonna kind of assume you know the film.
AdamUh, we will also.
ChrisIs it possible to spoil it any more than it did itself?
AdamThat's very true. And and on and on that note, I would like to advise people that they probably will be some bad language in this, if anything, just because of the quality of the film. But who knows, that is that is not to be, uh, we we shall not go into this with a downward slope, but we will certainly say that things can only get better.
AdamSo.
AdamGentlemen, we are gathered here. Does, um, so, in terms of, uh, viewing, obviously, we've all watched the we've all watched The Phantom Menace in preparation for this, but.
AdamUh, gentlemen, any other business that you might want to have been watching?
AdamUh, Chris, have you seen anything?
ChrisYes, so we decided to watch the the Lego Star Wars Christmas Holiday Special, I think it was called.
ChrisUm, because I thought, I'll show my kids something Star Wars, we still can't quite watch all the films fully and they get a bit annoyed when I skip parts.
ChrisUm, but they did actually really quite enjoy the, uh, this Holiday Special.
ChrisAnd, and I must say, watching, seeing them watch it and laughing at parts, I think probably helped me enjoy it a lot more than other people may have done.
ChrisUm, it definitely seemed to be aimed at them and it was just kind of, it was nice to see it was, you know, an anthology with a wrap around of all of the Star Wars, uh, movies combined.
ChrisAnd, yeah, it was just a bit of fun, really, with a, a sort of holiday Christmas idea.
AdamSo it's not just a Lego adaptation of the Holiday, the the the infamous Holiday Special.
ChrisI've never actually seen that and I will be watching it in preparation for one of these.
AdamI think I think We will be covering that, I think. Yes. As it's.
ChrisI've I've heard that it's available on YouTube.
UnknownYeah.
AdamI've heard that that annoys George Lucas, which I think is a good enough reason to watch it.
ChrisYes.
ChrisBut yeah, so I don't know. I'm not sure what the story from that was. Um, but yeah. Yeah, I thought they did okay with this.
ChrisIt was just fun.
AdamSo did it did any has anyone else caught up with this?
UnknownYeah, I did.
AdamI think.
UnknownI remember.
AdamOh, and and and from a non-parent, sorry,.
ChrisYeah.
UnknownSo I say I've not seen it yet.
AdamAh.
AdamSo, uh, but from a non-parental view, Lee, how did it how did it go down with you?
LeeUh, I found it disappointing, I've got to be honest.
LeeUm, again, I think that's the thing, it's, it obviously is aimed at kids. I knew it was going to be aimed at kids. Um, but from like, you know, the Lego movies and stuff, are generally really good and they've got enough humor in them.
LeeThat I I'd love them to piece it. I hoped it was going to be more of that, but it wasn't.
ChrisSee, I think I think if you went in with that expectation, I could completely understand disappointment.
ChrisWhen it started, in my head, I was just thinking silly, silly, silly, but it grew on me.
ChrisAnd especially as I say, seeing the kids laugh and enjoy parts of it.
ChrisAnd yeah.
ChrisBut I think as well, my general impression of holiday specials are, they're not top quality content.
ChrisThey are generally a bit thin and, you know, but they're just a bit of fun.
LeeYeah.
ChrisUm, it probably helped that we'd watched Phantom Menace. Um, again, I skipped a few bits, but we did manage to watch most of it.
ChrisUm, this was a couple of weeks ago, so, um, after that, I say the Holiday Special was pretty good.
ChrisAnd.
LeeYeah.
ChrisJust to yeah, just to, obviously, I have suggested that I'm not a huge fan of Phantom Menace, but actually, that's not completely true, which we will get into.
ChrisThere are there are parts of it that I like.
AdamFair doos.
AdamSo, Wes, have you have you been watching anything?
AdamStar Wars related or.
UnknownYeah, no, I, uh, last year when we first got Disney Plus, I watched the first three episodes of Mandalorian.
UnknownAnd then I I saw spoilers were on the horizon. So when the the last episode aired, we watched the rest of one and two all in one go.
AdamAh.
UnknownSo.
UnknownThat was good.
AdamI think I think some that is definitely my intention is to try and, uh, I want to try and catch up with The Mandalorian because the the spoilers are spoilt. But I enjoyed what I've what I've seen anyway, so I, you know, I will not purposely play the spoilers.
UnknownYeah, that's brilliant.
AdamBut, but yeah.
AdamAnd, um.
AdamBut more to the point, because then technically we might gently slip a Mandalorian in between, uh, Return of the Jedi and, uh, uh, the, uh, Force Awakens. Yes.
AdamSo, there we go.
AdamAnd Mr. Lee, have you been, uh, viewing anything?
LeeUh, yeah, so Star Wars related, uh, yeah, I saw the Holiday Special, um, and I didn't see the first season of Mandalorian as it was released.
LeeUh, on Disney last year.
LeeAnd this year, yeah, I waited until it was finished.
LeeUm, but yeah, people were getting very excited on social media, uh, about the final episode.
LeeSo, I literally the day after, I'd realised I had to smash through the entire season in one go, uh, so that nothing got spoiled.
UnknownYeah.
UnknownOh, what a day though.
LeeJust sit there for right.
Lee8 hours and just watch that.
LeeIt was absolutely brilliant.
LeeI loved it.
UnknownWell, we still had half of Series 1, so, you know, numb bums all around.
LeeYeah.
UnknownAnd the Christmas nuts out.
AdamOh.
AdamSave them for a special occasion.
AdamThe Mandalorian.
LeeYeah, it's I think it's just I I mean, it's gone to Disney, which I think is brilliant and I think they've done good things with the series as we'll get into later. Um, but yeah, like what they've done with The Mandalorian, it's brilliant.
LeeIt is, I would say it's more adult than Star Wars. Um, so it is aimed at us.
LeeYou know, obviously, the films when they come out were more aimed at possibly a younger audience and we've sort of grown up with it.
LeeUh, but The Mandalorian definitely.
UnknownThe Mandalorian fits in with the Empire sort of train.
UnknownYou know what I mean?
UnknownThat kind of thing, and it then it gets a bit Muppety, doesn't it?
UnknownBut, yeah, after the next thing.
UnknownSo.
LeeYeah.
AdamBecause I think there's a I think the certainly like like you say, The Star Wars and Empire and then you get to Return of the Jedi where you get the Ewoks.
AdamAnd you kind of get the impression that at that point.
AdamThey've realized that this is popular with children.
LeeYeah.
ChrisRight.
AdamSo they've thought, well, what should we do to put in stuff that's popular for children?
AdamNo, just continue what you're doing, you plank, because that's popular with children.
AdamYeah, clearly.
AdamBut never mind.
AdamUm, but yeah, no, I I get the I get the same thing. I think The Mandalorian is not it's it's good in so much as it's it's sort of grittier, if anything.
AdamBut it hasn't got into they did a spin-off of Doctor Who called Torchwood and that was just basically, oh, we can swear and show bums. And what's the fucking point?
UnknownYeah.
AdamYou know, if you're still shit, it's, you know.
AdamUm, but there we go.
AdamUm, well, I think, um, obviously, we, uh, we're gonna we're gonna tackle this mountain as we, uh, as we go.
AdamUm, so I've I had a look because I just thought I wanted to I wanted to get the feeling of, um, the Phantom Menace and try and remember in terms of where the world was.
AdamBecause although The Phantom Menace feels like it probably, in my brain, it's probably 10 years old.
AdamThat's roughly where I was.
UnknownYeah, yeah.
AdamBut but actually, it's 22 years ago this year.
AdamIt's actually, I think it's now.
AdamThe Phantom Menace is now the age, sorry, we're now at the age that The Phantom Menace was compared to the first Star Wars, A New Hope.
ChrisThat is a bit worrying.
AdamAge species, in age sort of, you know, in the time frame of it.
AdamUm, so this came out in 1999, and I don't know if people want to try and imagine in their heads like the, uh, the scroll as it goes up the the screen with the.
AdamUm, but, uh, yeah.
AdamTony Blair was still Prime Minister, Bill Clinton was the American President.
AdamUh, there was in the US, there was the Columbine massacre.
AdamUh, Bill Gates' fortune surpassed 100 billion dollars.
AdamUm, Clinton was acquitted of his impeachment.
AdamUm, and a, uh, bloke called George W. Bush had announced that he was going to run for the presidency.
ChrisIt's funny how that was the worst thing of the time compared to now, it's like, well, that was a a lovely walk in the park.
AdamExactly.
AdamYou know, this.
AdamThis.
AdamSpace.
UnknownHere today.
AdamYeah.
AdamThis all feels quite, you know.
AdamI mean, I mean, obviously, we're speaking from the perspective of 2021, so everything's fixed, obviously.
AdamThe 2nd of January, 2021.
AdamCovid doesn't exist anymore.
AdamThe economy's fine.
AdamIt's, yeah.
AdamSo, you know, we can look back at it with 2020 hindsight. But, um, whereas in the UK, uh.
AdamUh, TV presenter Jill Dando was murdered and that's still not solved.
AdamUm, far right fuckwit David Copeland nail bombed three pubs.
AdamKilling three and injuring 140 people.
AdamThe UK introduced the minimum wage.
AdamGary Glitter received his first prison sentence for possession of child porn.
AdamUm, the London Eye was installed and the Millennium Dome completed.
AdamAnd towards the end of the year, George Harrison survived a knife attack from an intruder in his own home.
AdamUm, the Euro became the default currency in the European Union, Boris Yeltsin resigned leaving a little known lad called Vladimir Putin as the acting Prime Minister.
AdamThere was a coup d'état in Pakistan, the Kosovo war ended.
AdamSega launched the Dreamcast and and it was also the launch of Napster.
ChrisOh God.
AdamMuch to the.
AdamAnd but when you look back at that and you're like, fuck Napster, and it's just like, oh no, you know, electronic theft is is the be all and end all nowadays.
AdamThat's why, you know.
AdamNo bands make any money and suddenly Lars Ulrich doesn't look like such a cunt.
AdamApart from he is.
AdamSo.
AdamBut I mean, weirdly enough, and there was this thing, uh, it came up on I listened to the Not for everyone podcast people.
AdamBut it did come up on Not for everyone that there was something about 1999 being a a benchmark year in cinema.
AdamAnd like most years, there's some good stuff and there's some crap, so it's not really.
AdamYou know.
AdamBut, um, the weirdest one I found was Office Space, which I assumed was like 92.
UnknownYeah, I thought it was older.
AdamI thought.
AdamI thought it was really earlier than that, but you've got Office Space, Cruel Intentions, Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels.
AdamUh, The Matrix, Existenz, The Mummy, the Brendan Fraser one, Notting Hill, Austin Powers The Spy Who Shagged Me, Run Lola Run.
AdamSouth Park, Bigger, Longer and Uncut, Wild Wild West, Summer of Sam, American Pie, Blair Witch Project.
AdamEyes Wide Shut, the remake of The Haunting, the remake of House on Haunted Hill, uh, Deep Blue Sea, Mystery Men, The Sixth Sense, Stigmata.
AdamAmerican Beauty, Fight Club, The Straight Story, Boys Don't Cry, uh, Being John Malkovich, Sleepy Hollow, The World Is Not Enough, Toy Story 2.
AdamThe Green Mile, Magnolia, Human Traffic, and probably best of all, Guesthouse Paradiso.
LeeThat is quite a year.
ChrisNot bad, yeah.
AdamIt's that's what I mean, it's like it's perfectly half and half.
AdamI like the fact that you've got you've got the sort of like shoddy annoyance of American Pie, and then you've got all the credit lauded that you that went to American Beauty, but now no one's going to watch it, because it's Kevin Spacey lusting after someone underaged.
AdamAlthough I would argue that surely that's in the same sort of spirit as, you know, where they say, no, you should have disabled actors portraying disabled people. And you should have trans actors portraying trans people. They got a nonce in to portray a nonce. So that was very true to the community.
UnknownYes.
AdamSo that was lovely of them.
AdamI think.
AdamPossibly.
AdamUm, TV.
AdamYou got the debut of The League of Gentlemen.
AdamSpaced, which obviously bears quite a lot quite a lot going on here with The Phantom Menace.
AdamUh, Family Guy, Futurama.
AdamUh, Rock Profile, Bang Bang It's Reeves and Mortimer, Smack the Pony, The Sopranos.
AdamHippies, Spongebob Squarepants.
AdamDIY SOS, Loose Women, The Fucking Naked Chef, Charmed and Bad Girls.
AdamSo, again, you know, a very mixed bag there, shall we say?
AdamUm, but, yeah.
AdamI was quite, it made me laugh that I realized, oh, yeah, Spaced came out and then it's the second series of Spaced that quite very much deals with the the the fallout of The Phantom Menace.
AdamSo.
AdamUm, and then in music, the top singles, you've got Baby One More Time, No Scrubs, Pretty Fly For A White Guy.
AdamMy Name Is, uh, M&M, Macy Gray with I Try, Lenny Kravitz' other hit, Fly Away.
AdamUh, Believe, with Cher, uh, Genie In A Bottle, Rewind, when the crowd say Bow Selector.
AdamMambo Number Five, Sing It Back.
AdamMr. Wazo, with Flat Beat, so I'm assuming the advert was on at that point.
AdamUm, Praise You, National Express, The Divine Comedy.
AdamUm, and then I was looking at music and I suddenly realised, ah, this might be where a lot of us feel a much more, it'll take us back to that time.
AdamUm, there's Hours, David Bowie.
AdamUh, which incidentally, first I didn't I didn't know this until I was looking this up today, first album to ever be released commercially as a download.
ChrisHmm.
AdamLike completely, and also was available two weeks before the physical version.
AdamSo, once again, the fucker was ahead of the curve.
AdamSo.
ChrisYeah.
ChrisThat was the only.
AdamHe was the first significant person to die in 2016.
AdamYou know, he beat all the rest of them.
AdamThere's no.
AdamPoint with everyone.
AdamElse was going.
AdamIt was.
AdamWas it.
ChrisWas it.
AdamUm.
AdamThen you've got significant other Limp Bizkit, Battle of Los Angeles, Rage Against The Machine.
AdamNine Inch Nails The Fragile.
AdamCome on Die Young, Mogwai, Death In Vegas The Contino Sessions.
AdamUh, Hot Water Music's No Division.
LeeYes.
AdamUh.
AdamCalifornia, Mr. Bungle, Californication, Red Hot Chili Peppers.
AdamSlipknot's self-titled album, White Stripes' self-titled album.
AdamMoby's Play, which is famous for being for every single fucking song being licensed to an advert.
LeeYeah.
AdamUm, Insane Clown Posse, the Amazing Jeckel Brothers.
AdamUh, Supergrass's Supergrass album.
UnknownNice.
AdamWhich is the one with Pump It On The Stereo and Moving.
AdamUm, 2001, Dr. Dre, Issues, Korn.
AdamFantomaz' self-titled debut, Atari Teenage Riot, 60-Second Wipe Out.
AdamRoots Manoeuvre, Brand New Second Hand, Ministry Dark Side of the Spoon.
AdamOpeth with Still Life.
AdamDillinger Escape Plan with Calculating Infinity.
UnknownNice.
AdamSix From Manson, How I Learned To Love The Boot Boys by The Altar.
AdamMidnight Vultures by Beck, Juxtaposed by Tricky, and it just gets worse by Anal Cunt.
AdamSo, you know, there you go. I think we've got a good it gives you a fair summation of the times in which.
AdamWe were we were first exposed to the Phantom penis.
UnknownI think there's yeah, something in there for everyone with that music collection, I think.
AdamOh.
AdamOh, I tell you what, I mean, that was the thing. I was I was I was looking through the albums and it was like, oh, you know, there's some cracking stuff in there and the singles, it was like, oh, so this is where it went wrong.
UnknownI was just saying when you're mentioning the singles at the beginning, I was like, I don't like any of those.
UnknownI mean, obviously, I mean.
AdamThey're I'm only going on what was top selling.
LeeYeah, yeah, oh, yeah, of course.
AdamRather because that was the thing, unfortunately, and again, I don't know whether the world has changed so much in that sense that you just had to put up with other people's stuff more.
AdamNowadays you can just lock yourself in a bin and just happily, you know, listen to your own farts from here to eternity.
AdamBut back then, all these things were unfortunately encroaching into our lives.
LeeYeah.
AdamWe were aware of of Britney and No Scrubs and.
AdamSo No Scrubs is actually a pretty good fucking song.
AdamBut that's another story.
AdamBut yeah, so and then.
AdamOh God.
UnknownOh God.
AdamAnd, um.
AdamYes.
AdamSo.
AdamI think we've got to start on a JFK note.
AdamSo, uh, Lee, how did you first encounter The Phantom Menace?
LeeSo I remember when that you remember they re-released the VHSs in the gold and silver boxes and they had like a documentary thing, I believe was where I saw it.
LeeUm, and they were yeah, basically when they came out and they said, oh, the plan is they're gonna go back and do prequels, but they're not going to be out for another five years or ever.
LeeAnd I just remember thinking, that's a lifetime away.
LeeUm, but that's because I'd never sat through an hour and two hours and 15 minutes of The Phantom Menace at that point.
LeeWhere time dilation becomes much more, uh, poignant.
LeeUm, but yeah, so I remember it coming out.
LeeI didn't go to like the midnight viewing or whatever, but I went opening week.
LeeUm, and I think, not to give too much away, I think when I left the cinema, I remember leaving it thinking, that was great, I really enjoyed it.
LeeBut then I bought it as soon as it was released and realised it sat on the shelf for three months and I never even watched it.
LeeI think it was when I started to realise that I might have had slightly rose tinted glasses on.
AdamIt definitely, I think it definitely did have that, it it had the right effect that Star Wars always has, which is you come out and you're really pumped up.
AdamNo matter which one it is you've watched, it's only it's only picking over it in your head in the subsequent days, weeks, months, years, decades.
AdamThat you really, you know, you you can really sort of you can really overdo the autopsy with these things, I think.
AdamYeah.
AdamBut, um.
AdamYeah.
AdamUm.
AdamUh, Chris, did you where were you first encountering it?
AdamDid you see it at the cinema or?
ChrisYeah.
ChrisYeah, we're somewhat similar to Lee, I remember it was 1992 and we'd gone to Florida and I I just recently really got into Star Wars just before that.
ChrisUm, I was into it younger.
ChrisBut then it just really kicked off around that sort of time.
ChrisAnd we went on the Star Tours ride and came out into the shop and I remember I was looking around at all the things.
ChrisUm, and there was an attendant there started talking to me and he was quite excited and said, oh, you know, they're bringing out a new film.
ChrisAnd I was just bowled over completely at that point, it was just like, I cannot wait.
ChrisAnd yeah, like Lee said, it was like so far in the future.
ChrisSo I guess that was yeah, it was 1999 or seven years away.
ChrisUm.
ChrisBut yeah, we did go, um, Romford Odeon.
ChrisI think there was about 20 of us and we I think we went to the the midnight showing, um, and I.
ChrisLike obviously so excited.
ChrisI definitely enjoyed it.
ChrisIt's a spec spectacular, you know.
ChrisIt's spectacular.
ChrisUm, but yeah, it's when you start to think through the details that something is lost.
AdamAnd, uh.
AdamWes, if I remember it right.
AdamWe went to the cinema together to see it, didn't we?
UnknownYeah, we did.
UnknownAnd then we came out and we was in a car park, me, you and Dean, and there was a stick in the car park and it became our lightsaber.
AdamYes.
AdamWe were, that's how that's how pumped up we were is we were in the car park of Rainham Tesco's.
UnknownYeah, that was it, yeah.
AdamUh, swapping at each other with a load of branches.
UnknownYeah.
AdamAnd, uh, yeah.
AdamSo.
AdamSo, again, I think we came out on a very on a very positive note and I think weirdly enough, I think the thing that was the realization for me was that I'd never.
AdamI I didn't buy them.
AdamAs they were coming out.
AdamAnd it's similar to you, Lee, is I think it was that that same sort of thing is I was like, they came out and I wasn't in a hurry.
AdamExcuse me.
AdamUh.
AdamOh.
AdamMy midichlorians, all on my hands.
AdamSorry.
AdamUm, oh dear.
AdamBut yeah, and it was again, it was just that thing of not being that much of a hurry to, uh, sort of pick it up again.
UnknownYeah.
AdamUm.
UnknownI was the opposite.
AdamYeah, I know.
AdamI think you were very.
UnknownAs soon as it came out on video, I got it on video. As soon as it came out on DVD, I got it on DVD. Even to the point where we went to London and, uh, we went to Forbidden Planet and you bought me and Dean the double-edged lightsaber each.
UnknownAnd then we was in the garden, my mom and dad was there, and we was in the garden setting up obstacles and we had a tournament.
UnknownDo you remember?
AdamI did remember this.
AdamYeah.
AdamBecause I also I was also very proud.
AdamThat you'd worked out the you'd placed, um, like Celotape within, because it was like the plastic extending lightsaber that you took out.
UnknownThey were they were the product withdrawal ones, do you remember? The bloke we bought we bought them and the bloke was in Planet said, you shouldn't be selling them to you because these are on product withdrawal because the lights inside would melt the plastic.
AdamOh, yes.
AdamThat was it.
ChrisAdd realism.
AdamI wonder what happened to that man.
AdamI think he might be I think he might now be Jeff Bezos.
UnknownYeah.
UnknownYeah.
AdamBut who knows?
AdamBut yeah, no, I was and you'd you'd reinforce yours with tape as well, so that they wouldn't, because because, because strangely enough, when you give that to a fully grown man,
Adamand he starts flipping out the blades, suddenly they fly off in all fucking directions.
UnknownNot in my house.
AdamThey're not designed for you.
UnknownNo.
AdamUm.
AdamBut, um.
AdamYeah.
AdamAnd I think I think that was the key and probably the smartest thing about this film is by you end with Darth Maul.
AdamEssentially.
AdamSo that's that's the thing you come out remembering.
AdamUm.
AdamSo.
AdamSo.
AdamI mean.
AdamLet's see.
AdamI mean.
AdamAs a film, so we again, it's the weirdest thing.
AdamYou're aiming at kids.
AdamSo what do we start with a trading bargain?
AdamBecause kids love that.
UnknownSpace Brexit, isn't it?
AdamYes.
AdamExactly.
AdamYou know.
AdamIt's Space Brexit in which.
AdamWhat.
AdamI can only, I mean, I mean, again, there's there's there's a worrying trend in in certainly in The Phantom Menace, there is a worrying trend, in so much as you seem to have a bunch of Japanese frogs.
UnknownHmm.
UnknownYeah.
AdamUm, running the trade organization, then you have a Rastafarian frog, and then you've got the blue guy, Watto, who is racist but I'm not sure who to.
UnknownYeah.
AdamIt just seems to be most of Europe.
AdamBut it's, yeah.
AdamSo there's there's a few.
AdamAccents and things where you think.
AdamHmm.
AdamThis seems a bit off.
UnknownQuestionable.
ChrisYeah.
ChrisBut so I thought like to compare them and I I'd try not to compare it too much, but I think they did quite well with the original films in making some unusual accents and languages that did you couldn't really tell what they were meant to be.
ChrisAnd yet in this, yeah, they made them almost sound too real, too similar to actual languages.
ChrisAnd it.
ChrisYeah, that lost yeah, it lost something in doing that.
AdamBecause.
AdamI suppose it's also that thing, which Star Wars actually manages to avoid certainly in the expanded universe side of things, but there is there is I mean, there is an inherently sort of xenophobic streak in sci-fi, whereby.
AdamYou know, planets, they're all the same.
AdamYou don't get you know what I mean, you get like it'll be like, they're a proud and warlike race.
AdamIt's like, well, who's doing the fucking accounts, then?
LeeYeah.
AdamYou know, they can't all be fucking up up for a punch up.
AdamYeah.
AdamBecause how do you run that?
AdamThat's just doesn't make any fucking sense.
ChrisAlthough I do think I do think the, um, Naboo.
ChrisNabooians, um, are meant to be peace-loving and yet they've all got hidden weapons inside their chairs.
AdamYeah.
AdamIn your throne.
AdamHow fucking paranoid do you have to be?
LeeMy question, the thing that got me was.
AdamParanoid enough.
AdamSorry.
AdamGo on.
UnknownParanoid enough to have someone pretend to be you on the throne for 95% of the film.
AdamTo be honest, if I could get someone to represent me on the throne, it'd be a fucking blessing, I'd get a lot more done.
UnknownI'm not sure I'd get Keira Knightley to represent me though on the bog.
AdamI I I.
AdamWell, I.
AdamGot.
AdamI didn't.
ChrisI didn't realize that was Keira Knightley.
AdamYeah.
AdamApparently, at one point, her mum didn't know the difference.
ChrisOh, well, I don't feel too bad then.
AdamBecause I was because I was trying to work it out, because.
AdamAgain, I'm not sure when it's Keira Knightley and when it's Natalie Portman, and whether, you know, once Natalie Portman is a handmaiden is everything else with Keira Knightley.
ChrisYeah, I didn't think it was her after that at all until right at the end.
UnknownIt's Keira Knightley when they meet the Gungans as well at the start.
ChrisYeah.
ChrisYeah.
ChrisThat's right.
LeeThat's right.
LeeThat's right.
LeeI was going to say that was going to be my question.
LeeYou were saying about the Gungans and, you know, like, how, you know, The Naboo were supposed to be peace-loving and yet they're all hiding all these weapons.
LeeMy biggest thing was the Gungans, who cannot breathe underwater.
LeeAdmittedly, they can swim longer than, you know, than the Jedi could, but they can't breathe underwater.
LeeSo why do they decide to build cities and live underwater?
LeeWhere what was the benefit of that?
AdamOh, fun.
AdamCrazy.
AdamPeople.
AdamFor shits and giggles and also just to avoid the other lot who are clearly fucking paranoid.
AdamI mean, it'd be like, do you want to hang around this bunch.
AdamThis jumpy bunch of fucking humans?
AdamNo, let's go and live under the water, mate.
AdamIt's less hassle.
AdamYou know.
AdamBut I think that because I didn't realise as well that apparently they they pitched they pitched down I don't I can't remember whether it's they pitched down Natalie Portman to sound like Keira Knightley or vice versa.
ChrisHmm.
AdamBut that's why whenever she's the Queen, it always sounds a bit sort of stilted.
AdamLike a bad there will be no trade out there about.
ChrisAlthough although that doesn't explain why Ewan McGregor and Liam Neeson and everyone else also sound so bit stilted.
AdamYeah.
AdamI think that might in fairness, I think and this and this is something that again.
AdamGeorge Lucas, thank you for making Star Wars.
AdamThank you for creating the universe and thank you for letting other people play in it.
AdamBut I don't think that George Lucas is an actor's director, all the all the cast will always say that, like they go to George Lucas and he's like, just stand there and say it.
UnknownYeah.
AdamWell, they say that, don't they?
AdamYeah.
AdamI kind of need more than that.
AdamI actually, I tell you what, and this is something that the new films have kind of done, like the the the latest trilogy.
AdamUh, the Disney trilogy, shall we refer to them, I suppose.
AdamUm, because obviously the original trilogy, the the cast are pretty much unknowns.
AdamAnd similarly, like Daisy Ridley wasn't a big star.
AdamI think like John Boyega done Attack the Block, but that was you know, that and a couple of other bits, but that they weren't like proper big names.
AdamWhereas when they did The Phantom Menace, it's packed with like people you know.
ChrisYeah, some of the best actors doing some of their worst performances.
AdamAnd I wonder if I wonder if that's the thing.
AdamYou know, is it suddenly, you know, these people are being cut a drift and it's like, shit, I thought I was, you know.
AdamBecause like, for example, Liam Neeson apparently signed up before he read the script.
AdamJust because he really likes Star Wars.
AdamAnd I can I can understand that.
AdamBut I bet there were a few days when it was like.
AdamShouldn't read this, shouldn't I?
AdamFuck.
AdamBut obviously, like, I mean, even you get like minor parts, like you've got, um, uh, what's his name, like Ralph Brown from Withnail and Stoke is, he's a pilot in it.
AdamAnd you've got and well, I mean, even like.
AdamI mean, obviously, she goes on to be bigger, but like Keira Knightley in a fairly minuscule role.
AdamThat you don't even realize.
ChrisHas she done Pirates?
AdamUh.
AdamNo, I don't think I don't think Pirates of the Caribbean had been done yet.
UnknownPirates.
UnknownThat hadn't been done yet.
AdamNo.
AdamBut I mean, it's but pretty much sort of, I mean, yeah, Liam Neeson, Ewan McGregor, um, in fact, probably, I mean, even, well, Samuel L. Jackson.
AdamI mean, fucking hell, 1999, Samuel L. Jackson was like, I mean, he's still a huge name.
AdamAnd actually, a man who's done very all right for himself.
AdamYeah.
AdamI'll have three, I'll have three Star Wars and a fuck ton of Avengers movies, please.
AdamAnd I shall just retire to my own private island made of gold.
AdamSo.
AdamKudos to Mr. Mr. Jackson, I think.
LeeYeah, and let's not forget you're saying about the star-studded cast, I did I don't I can't remember if I spotted it before, or this was the first time.
LeeOne of the pilots at the end, uh, when they go on that skirmish, uh, is Celia Imrie, who's Babs from Airport 9.
AdamYes.
AdamYeah, and from like.
UnknownNo.
AdamYeah, the Irish the Irish one who's also who's also in Pulp Fiction.
AdamShe turns up in Pulp Fiction.
AdamYeah.
AdamAnd again, yeah.
AdamThere's there's like a lot of really fucking big names.
AdamWhereas I think that and I think maybe that's why a lot of people have gone and going.
AdamWhat's happening here?
AdamBecause you went to see the original, directed by George Lucas.
AdamYou didn't know what Mark Hamill or Carrie Fisher really you didn't know what their performances were like.
AdamWhereas this, it's like.
AdamI've definitely seen Liam Neeson better than this.
AdamI've definitely seen Ewan McGregor better than this.
AdamAnd it's it's a pity because I think everyone's.
AdamI think everyone's coming at it from the right place, because I think everyone everyone's everyone's obviously leapt on it because well, it's Star Wars, so it's a license to print money, but also everyone's like, yeah, I want to be in fucking Star Wars.
AdamOf course I do.
AdamI mean, even down.
AdamTo the fact that in like you've got things like when Daniel Craig turns up as a Stormtrooper in The Force Awakens and things like that.
AdamAnd yeah, that's like no one needed to know.
AdamAnd it doesn't matter a tall to the fucking plot.
AdamNo.
AdamBut it's just sort of like, yeah, can I be in Star Wars?
AdamWell, yeah.
AdamBe a Stormtrooper.
AdamYou're all right.
AdamThat's that's the level of love that the that these these bring out.
AdamI also think it's a very interesting fact that apparently Phantom Menace is the, um, made the has made the most money, or was like the best, had the biggest box office of any of the Star Wars films.
AdamYeah.
AdamSo.
AdamAnd I think it is that anticipation, but then I also think, ah, but then it dropped off, didn't it, where a few people where a few people were like, yeah, I won't see this on video.
AdamYeah.
ChrisBut to try and bring a bit of balance to the force.
ChrisUm.
ChrisLike I I think what I like about it, overall, I think it is a fun film.
ChrisAnd it is good entertainment, if it probably if it was a bit shorter.
ChrisUm.
ChrisBut, you know, essentially, it does have some good ideas of the political intrigue potentially.
ChrisIt's a great idea.
ChrisI did like the to see Emperor Palpatine and his story.
ChrisUm.
ChrisPod racing was a fun segment, um, you've got the space battles.
ChrisAnd and I did like and I think this helped watching it with my kids, the comedy aspect, it definitely worked.
ChrisSo they where I hated Jar Jar, they quite liked him and I realized, okay, he absolutely is owned at someone who just wants to see a bit of slapstick silliness.
AdamYeah.
AdamI think I I remember.
AdamI think when I I certainly I think when when I saw it and I think sort of sort of me, Wes, Dean, I think Bust was with us as well and I think we we all initially were like, oh, Jar Jar's quite funny.
AdamAnd then it was like.
AdamHe's he's he's staying in the fucking film, isn't he? You know, if he's, you know, it's like, you know, much in the same way as it's like, if it had been like a sort of creature cantinas.
AdamYeah.
ChrisYeah.
AdamAnd even the Gungans, because they're all a bit like, you know, look, I can create a whole army in CGI.
AdamDoesn't mean you should.
ChrisYeah.
LeeI think it's funny, a whole army in CGI, did you notice there's two shots where you see him coming over a hill.
LeeAnd that was the default background on Windows XP in 1999, I'm pretty sure.
AdamYeah.
AdamIt looked exactly like that hill.
AdamThere is something weird in this as well, which I did find, which was even when.
AdamAnd I don't know I'm not entirely sure where they filmed the the hill stuff.
AdamI'm kind of assuming it looks a bit like it could be Ireland.
AdamIt might even be England, I don't know, but it looks sort of quite, for one of a better phrase, it looks a bit fucking ordinary.
AdamYeah.
AdamAnd so.
AdamImmediately, especially when you've got a film, you've got a film on this scale and let's face it, there is no, you know, the the the money that is spent in this film is on show.
AdamThere's no, you know, they haven't sort of they haven't wasted that on all the names, they've definitely, you know, everything's there.
AdamBut as soon as they're just like all stood around a sort of little plastic shuttle that someone's cobbled together.
AdamAnd they're under a tree and it looks like they're in a field in Brentwood.
AdamYeah.
AdamIt fucked me, it suddenly looked really cheap.
AdamYeah.
AdamAnd you and you just I don't know what it is, I think it's just there you know, Naboo's, uh, sort of surroundings, like all the forestry stuff.
AdamMaybe it's just a bit too England, so it was like it just felt it feels falls a bit flat after you've had like the Tunisian deserts and ice planes and.
AdamYeah.
AdamUm.
AdamWell, I think.
AdamI think all in all, gentlemen.
AdamI think we've I think we've we've gone through that very well.
AdamAnd I'm glad to say that I think that we may have a series here, George.
AdamSo, you know.
AdamUm, join join us again in two weeks time for Attack of the Clones.
AdamUm, and, uh, yeah.
AdamOther than that.
AdamHappy New Year, everyone, and good night to you all.
AdamGood night.
UnknownGood night.
UnknownMay the Force be with you.
AdamAlways.
UnknownAlways.
AdamYeah, always and every way.
UnknownAlways.
AdamUh, possibly Lee, I just heard mention Obi-Wan's bloody rat tail.
AdamOh, yeah, because it gets cut off, doesn't it?
AdamHe has to cut that off, because that proves that he's a Padawan.
AdamYeah.
ChrisOh.
AdamI was.
ChrisWhere were we gonna do out of 10 as well?
AdamOh, shit.
AdamYeah, yeah, come back everyone, we haven't gone yet.
AdamTurn around, turn around.
AdamGet out the car.
AdamTurn them around.
AdamTurn them around.
AdamThat's no moon, it's a Cocker.
AdamRight, we're gonna blow this thing and go home.
AdamUm, gentlemen, uh, Chris, your rating out of a 10 midichlorians, what is your rating of this?
ChrisOh, I'm gonna give it 6.5. I think they did a serious effort. You know, great production, um, it's got lightsabers and, yeah, it's a fun film.
ChrisJust don't worry too much about the details.
AdamLovely.
AdamUh, Lee, your 10 out of 10 midichlorians.
LeeUh, I'm gonna go with five. Uh-huh.
LeeYeah, I say, again, it had it had some good parts.
LeeAnd if it'd been 45 minutes long, it would have been excellent.
LeeUm, and nothing else of any interest really takes place, you know, we discover Anakin for the first time and we found out that Palpatine's up to no good.
LeeAnd pretty much that's all we take away to the next movie.
LeeSo, I think five out of 10, for a 2000 and 20 minutes, is fair.
AdamFair doos.
UnknownWesley.
UnknownI will give it a six, because you've got to start somewhere.
UnknownAnd with this film, it it shows you what things were like before the fall.
UnknownSo, you know, you've got to start your journey somewhere.
AdamYeah, I'm gonna I'm gonna join Lee sitting on an even five. I feel it brings balance to the force. Um, there for every for every bit that pees me off, there's a bit that excites me.
AdamFor and you can't help but feel that everyone's giving a shit.
AdamWhich is definitely half the battle, especially if you're working against blue screens.
AdamAnd also anyone is being expected to to stand next to Ian McDiarmid and not be acted off the fucking planet.
AdamSo, yeah, I'm gonna go with a five with that.
AdamSo I believe.
AdamUh, in life after love.
AdamUh, I believe that gives that that gives The Phantom Menace a very healthy 22.5 out of 40.
AdamSo, we should at the moment, it's at the top of the leaderboard, but that's because there's no other fuckers on the leaderboard.
AdamSo.
AdamWe should continue, uh, and see what happens with Attack of the Clones.
AdamSo.
AdamMuch like the end of The Phantom Menace.
AdamWhere if you continue to the end, there's a weak bit of the Imperial March and then you hear Darth Vader breathing over the end credits.
AdamWe had a false ending there, so we'll say good night again.
AdamAnd, um, it's the first night.
AdamYes.
AdamWe're less organized than George.
AdamSee, we should have recorded episode 4 first.
AdamYeah.
AdamOh, yeah.
AdamYeah.
AdamWe're.
AdamFools.
AdamFull strength.
AdamRight.
AdamWell, good night everyone and thank you for listening.
UnknownGood night.
UnknownGood night.
UnknownMay the Force be with you.
